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Friday, February 29, 2008

what makes this weekend different from all other weekends


Thurs night: Saw Michael Showalter and Eugene Mirman perform stand-up at the MFA. THEY ARE PHENOM. I had no idea there were so many pseudo-Brooklyn hipsters living in Boston. And based on the fact that I was the only one who obnoxiously went "woo" when Showalter said he lived in New York, I decree that they are all poseurs. This is where Sam calls me a New York snob.
Friday: In approximately one hour, I will be interviewing Ben Karlin, former executive producer of The Daily Show and The Colbert Report for FM. How I got this job is beyond me

Friday night: Dins/Kroks concert. I'm kind of a huge all male a capella dork. Freshman year was all about the Dins. And now because of my main man, BShafs, I am kind of a Kroks convert. But dear lord, if there isn't something about boys in tuxedos snapping and having dorky, punny repartee... Now that I think about it, this might be my last time seeing both of them. Momentous. Also, there is a co-op party and a pudding party, my two favorite kinds of parties, except I probably won't go because Saturday is the All-Day. Instead, I will probably watch the episode of Lost I missed because I was too busy enjoying GODS OF COMEDY on Thursday night.
Saturday: CityStep All-Day. OMG My last one. I always said that if I got to be the Exec Direc, I'd make my one lasting contribution to make this an hour later and guess what, I did. So you're welcome. After that, post all-day uno's? Birthday parties galore. Collapse into delicious 13-hour glorious sleep and wake up well-rested and ready for a new week... this may or may not happen. More likely, I will wake up at 2 pm, realize my room is a disasterzone and force myself to eat golden split pea soup while wearing the biggest possible hooded sweatshirt.

Are you ever late to things because you're updating your blog? No... just me? Fiddlesticks, must depart.

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

fierce!



Not sure why I like this so much. Probably because of the music. Gooftastic!

Today, I got positive news from my thesis adviser. And it was popcorn chicken day. And Wednesday, which means ANTM and Proj Run. My money's on Christian who is like a gay pokemon with hilarhair.


Finally, one more video in case you need cheering up:

This kid is going to make a really good housekeeper someday.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

posts that make you dumb



[[Our Life is Not a Movie or Maybe ~ Okkervil River]]

This is kind of cool. Most surprising find: Colleges where the majority of students listed "I don't read" as their favorite book scored higher than those where "Fahrenheit 451" is listed as one of the favorite books. Also, that people at "smart schools" like Freakonomics. Isn't it kind of an airport read? I personally read it over intersession '07 in Florida, which is kind of like the airport of the United States, no?

Procrastinatory obsession of the day: Perry Bible Fellowship. This one's for Barry Shafrin, who kindly watched the beginning of Enchanted with me tonight, despite various technical difficulties. Amy Adams is kind of an awesome human being. (Is it weird that I use "kind of" to mean "really"? I mean, that is kind of the exact opposite of its meaning, right?)

Also, happy birthday to Megan Savage and Olivia Benowitz, two of the few people who actually read this... I hope.

Procrastinatory obsession of the day #2: LOLBAMAZ

Finally, here's a video of a dog dancing. If only we all were so talented. Honestly, though, the woman's not that great of a dancer, just the dog.

Monday, February 25, 2008

nothing says romance like burritos and benihana


I have a renewed appreciation or disgust for felipe's. Their chicken tortilla soup is phenoms, but they've had it 1 in 4 times I've been there. And I think it's kind of like a white boy place to eat. Is that weird? I just feel like there's always groups of white boys in baseball caps eating burritos there. Maybe it is one of those super-collegiate experiences that you think only exist on collegehumor.com. Oh, also the boys are carrying frat paddles, watching family guy on their laptops, and eating burritos out of solo cups. PBR burritos.

Countdown to the opening of Chipotle in the square: 9 days
Countdown to thesis due date: 24 days

"Then you whisper sweet nothins in her ear hole." -Flavah Flav on romance. His idea of a perfect date is Benihana and bowling. Currently, he is on Conan O'Brien with Will Arnett, which is a really ridiculous and amazinglarious trio of people, all trying to outdo each other in bravado and hilarity.

Sunday, February 24, 2008

let's go out to the mooooooovies


"In a more recent film, Murphy more explicitly vilifies the fat black woman he embodies, making her a central object of ridicule, even as he plays opposite himself as her love interest." -my "scholarly" wgs text on the film norbit (More on Norbit? I know, right?)

WGS, in case you don't know, refers to Women, Gender & Sexuality Studies and is what I would have concentrated in had I discovered it earlier. Mostly because they have hella parties with delicious foodies. And also because they seem to care about undergrads, which is exceeeeeeeedingly rare here.

On a less serious note, my Oscar picks for tonight:

1. Best Picture: "Atonement," "Juno," "Michael Clayton," "No Country for Old Men," "There Will Be Blood."
My prediction: There Will Be Blood

2. Actor: George Clooney, "Michael Clayton"; Daniel Day-Lewis, "There Will Be Blood"; Johnny Depp, "Sweeney Todd the Demon Barber of Fleet Street"; Tommy Lee Jones, "In the Valley of Elah"; Viggo Mortensen, "Eastern Promises."
My prediction: Daniel Day-Lewis (Isn't he the Last King of Scotland of mustachioed oilmen?)

3. Actress: Cate Blanchett, "Elizabeth: The Golden Age"; Julie Christie, "Away From Her"; Marion Cotillard, "La Vie en Rose"; Laura Linney, "The Savages"; Ellen Page, "Juno."
My prediction: Marion Cotillard (difficult considering no one uglified herself this year for a role, altho ellen page did get preggers)

4. Supporting Actor: Casey Affleck, "The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford"; Javier Bardem, "No Country for Old Men"; Hal Holbrook, "Into the Wild"; Philip Seymour Hoffman, "Charlie Wilson's War"; Tom Wilkinson, "Michael Clayton."
My prediction: Javier Bardem

5. Supporting Actress: Cate Blanchett, "I'm Not There"; Ruby Dee, "American Gangster"; Saoirse Ronan, "Atonement"; Amy Ryan, "Gone Baby Gone"; Tilda Swinton, "Michael Clayton."
My Prediction: Amy Ryan (uggggh i haven't seen any of these)

6. Director: Julian Schnabel, "The Diving Bell and the Butterfly"; Jason Reitman, "Juno"; Tony Gilroy, "Michael Clayton"; Joel Coen and Ethan Coen, "No Country for Old Men"; Paul Thomas Anderson, "There Will Be Blood."
My prediction: Coen Brothers?... PTA?... I'm going with Anderson

7. Foreign Film: "Beaufort," Israel; "The Counterfeiters," Austria; "Katyn," Poland; "Mongol," Kazakhstan; "12," Russia.
My prediction: Oh, who am I kidding? This isn't even an educated guesstimate. Let's go with Mongol.

8. Adapted Screenplay: Christopher Hampton, "Atonement"; Sarah Polley, "Away from Her"; Ronald Harwood, "The Diving Bell and the Butterfly"; Joel Coen & Ethan Coen, "No Country for Old Men"; Paul Thomas Anderson, "There Will Be Blood."
My prediction: They'll probably give it to either the Coens or Anderson depending on who doesn't win Best Picture... so prob No Country for Old Men

9. Original Screenplay: Diablo Cody, "Juno"; Nancy Oliver, "Lars and the Real Girl"; Tony Gilroy, "Michael Clayton"; Brad Bird, Jan Pinkava and Jim Capobianco, "Ratatouille"; Tamara Jenkins, "The Savages."
My prediction: Juno How awesome would that be, she's a stripper. And if they go the way of Little Miss Sunshine, it'll be the quirky family comedy with a heart of gold. Although I suppose Lars and Savages could both fall into that category. And YET. Did you hear the dialogue in Juno? It's like someone shot it in the face with a clever gun. AMAZING.

10. Animated Feature Film: "Persepolis"; "Ratatouille"; "Surf's Up."
My prediction: Ratatouille, motherfuckers. Unnecessary?

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Horrifying fact of the day

Norbit is nominated for an Oscar. Albeit for Best Makeup, but still. Norbit. Oscar. In the same sentence.

"It looked funny." -my mom on why she put Norbit on her Netflix and watched it. Which is surprising considering the horror stories we have of watching Big Momma's House 2 on the plane to Japan.

Monday, February 18, 2008

Best of the day

Word of the day:
tarantism: a nervous disorder characterized by melancholy, stupor, madness and an uncontrollable urge to dance

Best combination of my two favorite things since Indian food and porn night at femsex: the WINE RACK (thanks to elissa)


Worst useless fact of the day: The Who allowed Hilary Duff to cover "My Generation" and change the lyric "I hope I die before I get old" to "I HOPE I DON'T DIE BEFORE I GET OLD."

Best thing I found out today: Tim and Eric are coming to Cambridge!! Come see the show with me.

Saddest moment of the day: Reading the last chapter of Peter Pan for my Childhood: History and Literature class. Sometimes we tell ourselves we will never grow up and then find that we have.

"That was the last time the girl Wendy ever saw him. For a little longer she tried for his sake not to have growing pains; and she felt she was untrue to him when she got a prize for general knowledge. But the years came and went without bringing the careless boy; and when they met again Wendy was a married woman, and Peter was no more to her than a little dust in the box in which she had kept her toys. Wendy was grown up. You need not be sorry for her. She was one of the kind that likes to grow up. In the end she grew up of her own free will a day quicker than other girls."

the word comedienne is so '90s


If you haven't seen the Baby Momma trailer, you should. Tina Fey and Amy Poehler are comedic goddesses.

As is Mamram. This profpic is out of control goodlicious.

Him Her Him Again The End of Him is a fabulous novel (con appendices) by Patricia Marx, the first female writer for the Lampoon and a former staff writer for SNL. If you've been in one of those He's Just Not That Into You situations and been in total denial about it and now are ready to laugh about it even though inside you're still maybe just a little bit holding out for the teensy chance that maybe just maybe he will change, it's worth reading.

Finally, Ali Rich and I are putting together a weekly open improv workshop for ladies starting this week, so if you're interested in joining, e-mail me.

Friday, February 15, 2008

the joy of anxiety


Between 11 am and noon today, I had an extremely realistic nightmare that I left my window open and my computer on my windowsill and snow came in through the window, destroying my laptop. I woke up breathing heavily and trying to rearrange my ICal, so I would have time to go to the Mac Store until I saw my computer sitting dejectedly on my desk (dejected because I spend more time at Uno's than working on my thesis, but who am I kidding? my computer would rather me blog and google-read than work on my thesis anyway, right?) and yelped in raucous joy that it was alive, alive, alive.

Mollie (after Jenn dropped her computer): Oh man, that's like dropping your baby.
Jenn: Um, no, it's not.

Point being that with just over 30 days left before I hand in my thesis, the time in which I have horrifying anxiety dreams has begun, huzzah. Which brings me back to fifth grade in which my BFF received a tamagotchi (one of the few, but elite words that rhymes with my name) for her birthday, hated it, and gave it to me. Since they were banned at my school, I made my mom take care of it during the day and it lived for a marvelous 27 days until we both began having anxiety dreams about it dying for like four nights in a row and realized that we were living unhealthy lives. Those things were awful-- one day all cute and big-eyed and the next, they are sitting in their own feces or worse, they have X-es for eyes and are floating away to tamagotchi heaven. It's just kind of a shame that you can live your whole day thinking of something and then slip into dreamland and expect to escape and no, there it still is, haunting you in your sleep until you wake up in a cold sweat, screaming "Not my laptop arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhegaddddddddd."

Speaking of nightmares, courtesy of Best Week Ever,the top 10 reasons clowns are scary. You're welcome.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Happy almost VDay (heh, vd)

[[Easier to Lie ~ Aqualung]]

For more awesome Valentine's day e-cards, go here. I think someecards really captures the zeitgeist of our nation through their amusing greeting cards. "Capturing the zeitgeist of our nation" is my new favorite pretentious thing to say, and I swear during this, my last semester at Harvard, I vow to say it at least once in each of my sections.

"Oh, this rain it will continue through the morning as I'm listening to the bells of the cathedral. I am thinking of your voice and of the midnight picnic once upon a time before the rain began. And I finish up my coffee and it's time to catch the train." ~ Suzanne Vega

Rain sucks. Nuff said.

Also happy birthday, Julianne Ross. Unlike that creepy Cassie girl in Uno's or whatever, I think you're hot.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

re: yesterday, a quote

I find, more and more now, that my classes teach me things that I actually think about in life. I'm kind of in love with WGS because of that and wish I had discovered it earlier in my college career, but alas. And I suppose sociology gives me a broader lens with which to look at the world. As if any of this will be useful 10 years from now. Besides, of course, being able to refer to a play as Brechtian or a novel as post-Flaubertian at a cocktail party, which, really, is what going to Harvard is all about, no? Also, the ability to pretentiously overuse commas.

Anyways, I thought this quote was good after what I was thinking about yesterday in terms of not being debilitated by the tragic things going on in the world:

"This was disturbing. Only in the detachment of an incurable complaint, in the sanity of near death, could one cope with this for a moment. In order to exist rationally, Pnin had taught himself, during the last ten years, never to remember Mira Belochkin... because, if one were quite sincere with oneself, no conscience, and hence no consciousness, could be expected to subsist in a world where such things as Mira's death were possible. One had to forget..." ~ Nabokov, Pnin

I like that I took my first English class (The Novel after World War II) my freshman fall and am taking my second one (Post-War British and American Fiction) my senior spring. Such a lovely cycle with useless knowledge the meat of a sandwich made from Nabokovian bread. James Wood and Leland de la Durantaye are both endlessly fascinating, and having their soothing voices read out loud to the class is like being brought back to kindergarten when the teacher used to read "Trumpet of the Swan" and you'd try not to crunch too loudly on your animal crackers.

Monday, February 11, 2008

my mood is entirely dictated by the weather

[[Different Names for the Same Thing ~ Death Cab for Cutie]]

i do not want to sit inside all night long working on my thesis. but at the moment that seems inevitable. at least for the next few weeks. as lovely as my bed is, if i stayed in it all the time, i would be restless to the max.

also, this bitter cold is stupid. someone should tell it that it is not wanted here.




i just watched thin, an hbo documentary about anorexia, for my wgs class. and although it was mind-numbingly depressing and painful, i spent a lot of the time thinking about how one of the women looked like amy sedaris and also how i wanted to paint my fingernails blue.

should i feel guilty about this?? sometimes the world is too much to bear and it's better just to paint your nails blue and enjoy that.

an addendum: i realize this sounds incredibly blasé, so I will clarify: When the movie ended, I felt a feeling I haven't felt since femsex. Where I wanted like a hug or someone to process the movie for me, but instead, the lights just came up and I was in a room full of strangers and had to put on my scarf and act like we had just watched something normal like a youtube clip. So then I went to CVS and bought valentines and blue nail polish and then made cinnamon toast. I suppose the point is that no matter how shitty the world seems sometimes, you can't be debilitated by it, right? there is some middle ground between ignoring the problems in the world and being incapacitated by them.

ugh, i feel emo. like i'm 15 and just read the belljar for the first time.

Sunday, February 10, 2008

parenthetical statements about the weather


[[Forgiveness ~ Patty Griffin]]

The weather was schizophrenic today. Which was interesting, to say the least.
Best weather moment: At the Master's Tea, snow was falling in big blustery chunks and I could see them through Lino's big French doors and I felt as though I were in a snowglobe. If you ever get a chance to sit in someone's mansion by their fire, make some cucumber sandwiches, scones with clotted cream and lapsang souchong. It is the perfect meal to forgetting that you are a lowly college student who normally eats unhealthy amounts of popcorn chicken and midnight crab rangoon. (In case you don't know, rangoon is Chinese for creating a fake version of something, mixing it with cream cheese and deep frying it.)

Worst weather moment: Walking home from the Quad and worrying I might be blown away. Literally. (Sometimes I forget how to use the word literally and so I need to separate it and make it its own sentence. Just in case.) I have no socks. I'm not sure why. I went to Urban Outfitters to buy socks and accidentally spent my sock budget on fingerless gloves with owls on them and a blue velvet blazer. The point of that whole tangent (do tangents have points? tangents are lines, which are made up of infinite points but have no ends) is that it was in that frozen moment on the way back from the Quad that I briefly regretted purchasing the cute fingerless gloves with owls on them instead of ACTUAL GLOVES. Because if your gloves don't have fingers, they are basically just sleeves that you have pulled down onto your hands. They are, in fact, the opposite of gloves because they are not keeping your hands warm at all. Their sole purpose is to have cute little owls on your hands which hoot maliciously at you as cold, cold air bites into your numb aching fingers.

And I was beginning to believe that spring was coming. Still the sound of the wind sounds really nice when I'm inside working. (And by working, I mean eating leftover noodles and trying to catch up on the sisyphean task of google-reader-ing.)

Saturday, February 9, 2008

optimism (don't worry, it's fleeting)

word of the day
meliorism:the belief that the world can be made better by human effort

I think there's something extremely hopeful in knowing that each day until the summer is slightly longer than the one before it.

Friday, February 8, 2008

common casting: the liveblog-- FRIDAY!!



so no blog yesterday b/c of los tunos.

TONIGHT
6:34 omg dead there are literally 11 people tabling for literally 2 auditioners.
6:45 Barry attempts to remember what exactly happened last night. He's pretty sure he touched Charlize Theron's face.
7:20 Jekyll & Hyde has like 42 people sitting behind the table. It's super-intims except they're all pretty freshman girls, so less intims. Also, they have hummus.
7:25 There are mad opportunes here.
7:41 And rachel flynn said let there be music. And there was music. Nelson is being mad business-y. This is nelson:

buy, sell, buy, sell.

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

That's hot.


So yesterday was a super exciting day. The Lampoon, a semi-secret Sorrento- blahblahblah thisain'tthemotherfuckincrimson... had Paris Hilton come receive their Woman of the Year award, which I'm pretty sure is just a fake award just created to lure her to their little castle.

Anyways, while sitting in the Women's Center reading about anorexia in Victorian England, I received a text from Rachel "ooooogirlcansing" Flynn, saying "Please tell me I'm not the only one waiting for Paris Hilton outside the Lampoon." Oh my, thought I. How could I have forgotten this momentous occasion? So I tossed the book back on the shelf quicker than you can say "body dismorphia," and jetted off to Mt. Aubizzle St.

The place was crawling with A-list campus celebrities, but no sign of Paris. Every car that drove by, from limos to dump trucks, we surmised could be hers. Every blonde suddenly seemed suspicious. We even hypothesized that perhaps Sam Teller has always been Paris in disguise. We got interviewed by a couple local news sources....

FINALLY, at 2:15, her van pulled up and I got the best camera phone picture of her ever. She really did not have very much security detail. I honestly think I could have tackled her Borat-style and made her my wife. It is, after all, Massachusetts.

A quote from the goddess herself: "I'm literally so excited to be here."

If you'd like to see her (and me :D), check out this video.

I think I have discovered my true calling as a paparazzo, which Schmoli informs me is Italian for mosquito.

Photos to come once I can figure out how to move them from my phone to my computer. Did you know that you can't just throw one at the other? That seems inconvenient.

common casting: the liveblog-- WEDNESDAY!!

8:26 Yo, ish is mad boring. Perhaps this whole liveblogging thing was a bad plan. I feel like Morgan Spurlock on Day 12 of Project SuperSize or like Morgan Spurlock on Day 1 of his prison sojourn for 30 Days.
8:28 The HRDC Board attempts to sell T-shirts. Beth Shields models. Ben Glaser: "I don't think I can adequately see the T-shirt while it's on you."
8:30 Rachel Flynn wants to be referred to as Rachel "sweetass" Flynn. I think this is a name you have to earn. Feel better, Rheeq.
8:33 People are damn demanding. It's like they want to be blogged about, but they only want to be blogged about positively. Matt Stone wants me to mention his big, watery eyes... case in point:

His youthful vibrance is positively exhausting.
8:39 Jonah: "Don't think you're better friends with him now than me. I know his favorite colors and animals and stuff. And I know the places he likes to be touched in the night."
Sachi: "You know I'm going to blog about this, right?"
Jonah: "Let the world know, I'm not ashamed."
8:44 Ben Glaser is trying to enlist Matt Stone for Satire V ("Have you ever considered employing your humorous potential for other media... like the written word?).
8:45 HAND CHECK

8:55 A move to the Ag. Far classier here.

A tender moment between Jonah and Arlo. I think it looks like it should be in a Harvard admissions brochure.
Rachel: So I was in class today and the teacher- I mean, professor, I'm not four.
Caroline: You're not poor? What?
9:05 Barry takes out a really delicious looking sandwich.

9:08 Apparently, the last picture was too happy. Here's a judgier one.

Shrink Arlo assesses Jonah's problems. He has a lot of them.
9:12 The conversation turns to how fast it takes people to take a bra off and whether people keep their eyes open or closed. Barry shows us his making out face.
9:15 Gus, Barry and Rachel think I should start my thesis with one of the following things...
-Some people think improv is a pre-cursor to sketch. They are wrong.
-From the dawn of time...
-Improv is fun. That's what I used to always think.
-Webster's dictionary defines improv as...
9:17 Freshmen are doing work. I should probably work on my thesis.

9:20 Caroline says she is having problems with her tank top.
My response: You're not showing any more skin than you did in Respectably French, am I right?
::blank stares::
Me: Oh come on, nobody watches Respectably French???
Caroline: I've actually watched it a lot of times.
Me: You mean a lot of... times?
Caroline: ...
Where is Ben Steiner when you need him??
9:30Rachel gets frustrated that her "Sketches" compatriots are nowhere to be found and tells us we're all called back. 9:31Sara Wick shows up, meaning Barry and I do indeed have to audition. We do a steamy love scene.
9:45Peace out! Project Runway time!!!! Here's hoping Ricky gets strangled by his hats.

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

common casting: the liveblog-- TUESDAY!!


9:00 pm Things were super fun for about five minutes. Then people peaced out. People are freaking out because the Sweeney list is too long.
9:03 Sam Linden claims he has perfect pitch. I forgot about how much fun it was spending our fall common casting together. Steve Travierso looks cute in a blazer...

9:10 Kara's wearing a sassy half-pony and doing her typical bound. Sam is trying to teach me how to do accents.
9:18I find my inner voice but can't understand it because it because it speaks only in Bantu.
9:20 I attempt to go to the bathroom but have little success.
9:31 Sting performs "Hits of the HRDC."

9:50 Sweeney auditions are over. Matt Stone is clearly jealous that more people want to try out for Sweeney than Castaways, even though only a quarter of the school is even allowed to audition for Castaways. His eyes are too big and salamander-y to pull off the whole bitter, jaded thing.
9:53OMG Someone hijacked my computer and wrote scurrilous things (Dflanz' word). This is a travesty. For the sake of posterity and the integrity of my liveblog, I will not be deleting what they liveblogged. However, I am italicizing what the mystery blogger wrote so that I don't get blamed for their UNFUNNY-NESS.
9:55 Jonah just asked me if I wanted to go to PleasureTown. Matt Stone and Nelson leave to make love.
9:56 Derek Flanzreich would like to be referred to as a sex symbol. KDancewicz wants to be referred to as "rising campus star." They both look like assholes. The gossipgeek fame is going to DFlanz' head.
9:59 Jonah, Sam and I relive Children of Eden... as I do most of my life. This is a result of Sam unnecessarily harmonizing with crappy pop songs really loudly, per usual.
10:25 Every play and their mom has peanut butter cups. What the eff is up with that? I mean, I love them, but really... ORIGINALITY, PEOPLE. Sam keeps calling "Blasted" the only play with two forms of anal intercourse. I declare myself the only blogger with two forms of anal intercourse... I'm not really sure what that means.
10:30 Jonah and Kia are on the swing. Jonah is making faces at me. Kyle and I miss Ben Steiner. Literally. Caroline Rose is reading the Bible. Rilo Kiley plays faintly.
10:45 OBenz is trying to rival-blog me. She thinks she's been blogging longer than I have, but she has no idea... Jonah words of wisdom: "If you can't sing for a gremlin, you can't sing for an audition." I just discovered Photo Booth.
10:49 I think my blog needs some G.O.G.A. (girl on girl action, not to be confused with BOBA), so I ask Tisa to make out with me. DFlanz tells WKlyce that these are the best two days of his life because he's seen him twice. I smell bromance.
GETTING READY

AND HERE WE GO

10:53 Tisa Vo has contracted the Rendang.
10:59 It just got a whole lot more fergalicious in here. I'm surrounded by acapeople. Kyle just asked me if I was still auditioning for things and was shocked and chagrined that, in fact, I am not.
11:03 CAROLINE ROSE JUST BROKE A CHAIR AND FELL THROUGH ONTO THE FLOOR. IT WAS HILARIOUS.

DFlanz said he loves it when I talk dirty to him. Eat your heart out, gossipgeek.
11:08 Barry and Alison are literally whoring themselves out for people to audition for Children's Theatre. Barry attempts the Zac Efron dance. Alison screams at Kyle, "They're never going to call you!!!" A peanut butter cup fight breaks out.
11:09 Calm has been restored to the Ex. Matt Bohrer and Kyle are both practicing their Sweeney songs softly in my ears at the same time. It's a little weird, and by weird, I mean hot.

11:10 CRoseG: "Why is the Bible, like, so random?"
11:14 OBenz: "I remember these balls. They're so much fun." TVo: "I want to play with the balls too." This room is full of SLUTS. JEZEBELS.
11:16 OBenz: "See? Guys think I'm cute because I dance badly." I am currently judging her. With love.
11:20We named the Gremlin "Princess Gremmykins the 14th." Tisa says I need to leave for mental health reasons.
11:23 Things are getting lame, so I have resorted to survey questions. Kevin Ferguson and Tisa have the same favorite sex toy... THE RABBIT. Scoped! Sara Wright's favorite pump-up jam is "Lose Yourself" by Eminem. I think the night is coming to an abrupt close... (Tisa: "Seems pretty drawn out to me.")
11:27 Good night, dear readers. See you tomorrow... you know you love me. gossip girl.

Monday, February 4, 2008

common casting: the liveblog



I'm liveblogging common casting tonight, so come by anytime this week to relive the mayhem.

MONDAY
7:00 Ok, so kind of late, but better late than never. It's like medium energy level at the EX. No swing. When I was a freshman, I really wanted to be confident enough to get up on the swing, but was terrified I would hurt myself.
7:03 Matt Bohrer informs me I smell like flowers. HRDC president Allison Kline looks authoritative and hot. Super hot. Also, she doesn't want me to liveblog about her, but I told her that if she's going to be the HRDC president, she has to prepare to be an A-list campus celebrity. Fame is hard.
7:11 "Harvard theatre veteran" Barry Shafrin directs my attention to Jason J. Wong's op-ed on race and theatre.
I think it's actually really good and not as controversial as everyone seemed to be worrying about. I will mull it over and have more to say when I'm not trying to be pithy and hilarious... and failing.
7:20 omg I just figured out that they have play-doh. this is a momentous occasion.
7:22 AKline thinks I'm being creepy and tells the Ex that when she is old, her grandkids will think blogs are lame. The Beauty and the Beast soundtrack is over and they have moved on to the Nutcracker. I think I should check out the Ag...
7:38 The Ag is so quiet.. no music. :( Also too bright for my tastes. Rheeq and I ran into Mamram on our way here and she tap danced on the steps of the Ag for me. It was soups hot. Now Rheeq is sick of me telling people about the liveblog and has developed a sass. That's right. A sass.
7:45 Kia McLeod just put on JT... That's right, it's a party. Caroline Rose feels like she is being watched. Isn't this the quintessential issue in sociology/academics/blogging/stalking? How best to capture a moment without changing it by attempting to capture it... THINK ABOUT IT.
7:52 HRDC President emeritus Kara Kaufman just made an appearance calling for Sweeney. Her boobs look really pretty, all of them. Ms. Scharff would be P.O.ed. I tried to make her say, "This is my last Common Casting," but she refused. One of these days, we're going to have to deal with it.
8:28 PEAK TIME!!! I just auditioned for Twelfth Night. Candy report: Peppermint patties, peanut butter cups, gummi worms. The Ex is hopping now. Kind of. Except that they are playing Beauty and the Beast AGAIN. Mamram report: On the move, heading to the Ag, writing a song about AKline. Jonah Priour has a medium beard. Less than he had when he was shooting for some VES movie. But more than usual. He says he is trying to look manly for Sweeney, but I informed him that Sweeney is a barber and would never let his beard get scruffy... or anyone else's.
8:30 Jack Fishburn just squeezed play-doh through his fingers and said "This is what Harvard theater does to me." But Dan Pecci says that it guarantees you a part in a Ben Stiller film... So I suppose you win some, you lose some.
8:34 OMG. The duchess (arich) and I just found mikehoagland.com, thanks to the petch.
8:37 PECS A PLENTY.
8:43 wow, it just cleared out. but petri wants me to announce her entrance. and let me tell you, she is here. and stealing people's textbooks. dan pecci doesn't like smart people. also he said he is responsible for rape and suicide. MORE IMPORTANTLY, ben rigged up the swing in the dark. it is miraculous.
9:00 I AM ON A SWING.
9:02 Alana Ju wants me to liveblog her giving me a lap dance. But it's far more difficult than I thought it'd be because I need my computer to be on my lap to liveblog. The Jekyll & Hyde crew emerges from their Rehearsal Room lair. Jonah and I are going to audition for the Freshman Musical together... we have big things planned.
9:15 Ali, Petri, Chris Schleicher and I are learning the Zac Efron Bet On It dance via YouTube.


9:43 The Ag is now far inferior to the Ex. Except that Paige Martin aka She Who Walks on Her Hands and the Magnificent Claire Eccles are here.
10:00 I brought 3 balls from the Ex to the Ag and was attempting to juggle. None too successfully.
10:15 Home for the night... Kara and I share a sentimental moment. Only four days left. :( See you tomorrow!

a case of senioritis

Anyone who knows me knows I have a slight tendency towards the dramatic and the overly sentimental. And in the past, I have been known to express these dramatic oversentimentalities through:
a) tears
b) bitter sarcasm
c) extensively long yearbook quotations
d) blogs

Okay, so I have a thesis to write. But I find that to be a triviality when it comes to the bigger picture. There is so much to learn about oneself and one's nature in one's senior spring. And one being me, I figure this is as perfect a time as any to start a blog (my fifth blog, no less). Because really senior spring is all about finding out you are momentously unprepared for the real world. And I think a blog is the ultimate expression of disregard for reality. Because a blog assumes the real world cares about you, that the world revolves around you really, that people want to hear what you have to say and that your little world matters. All of this feels relatively true at college (okay, I've spent 21 years realizing the world does not revolve around me, but that's a moot point), but one day, four months from now, I will be tossed into New York City, quite probably jobless and homeless, and all of this will feel so trite and inconsequential then. So in these four months where I can pretend these things are fundamentally untrite and consequential, I choose not to face the real world. Or any real responsibilities I have (which include but are not limited to finding a job, finishing my thesis, finding a place to live, graduating). And instead focusing attention on this, my senior spring blog. Kudos, me.